Tag Archives: loss

111 Days Walking

On New Year’s Day 2019, I lost a dear friend to reckless driving. 

Few months back, he’d mapped it out and said that it would take only 111 days to walk to where I am. This poem is inspired by that conversation.

Here you go Niekje.

You said you’ll be
Right over, it‘s only 111
Days walking;
I said I’mma put the
Kettle to boil and make you
Some koffie

Why didn’t you come
Right over, it‘s only 111
Days walking;
If you did you’d (still) be here
With me, and none of this
Would‘ve happened.

You liar.

You said I got plenty
Of time, cuz it‘ll be 111
Days walking;
But that quiet New Year’s
Morning has taken you further
From me away

And you’re never gonna
Come anymore, not with 111
Days walking;
I know you didn’t want to go
This way, and I know you were
Fighting for your life
But that driver was too reckless
You had too short a ride

I’mma put the
Kettle to boil and make you
Some koffie, and you
Can have some after
111 days walking.

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I Want To Know You

I want to know you –
Your typical morning habits
What you totally hate eating
What you actually mean when
You don’t say a word, or do
Little things that often go
Unnoticed, except when time
Stands still, but time is
Never on our side, so
Before it’s too late
I want to know you.

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Deja Vu: Translated

Heard this by chance and was immediately smitten, so
Here’s the English sing-able true-to-meaning translation.
(Well, as far as possible. ;))

Like a fresh lemon tequila
With a dash of salt you flavour
Same old wounds, the same old song
Well, it’s the same old story
Like the way you would have told me
Déjà vu, an endless song
(Tú me abriste las heridas que ya daba por curadas
Con limón, tequila y sal
Una historia repetida
Solamente un déjà vu que nunca llega a su final)

Oh, I’m better solo
To forget your eyes, your touch and let you go
Oh, I’d dance alone
To forget that we had ever had it all
This bachata, hipocresía total
(Mejor me quedo solo
Y me olvido de tus cosas, de tus ojos
Mejor esquivo el polvo
No quiero caer de nuevo en esa foto
De locura, hipocresía total)

I’ll never love anymore
Leave, turn and tango
One last dance now from me with just a song
I’ll never love anymore
Like our bachata
Just a last dance for me in a song
Don’t say you love me anymore
I won’t speak of love
Won’t speak of love anymore
No, won’t speak of your love no more
(¿Quién puede hablar del amor y defenderlo?
Que levante la mano por favor
¿Quién puede hablar del dolor y pagar la fianza?
Pa’ que salga de mi corazón
Si alguien va a hablar del amor
Te lo aseguro, esa no voy a ser yo
No, esa no voy a ser yo)

It’s her idea, rewind and then play
To cajole and tease, she then sways
And my mind and soul restir
Well, it’s the same old story
Like the way you would have told me
Déjà vu, an endless song
(Esta idea recurrente
Quiere jugar con mi mente pa’ volverme a engatusar
Una historia repetida
Solamente un déjà vu que nunca llega a su final)

And oh, I’d stay alone
To forget your eyes, your touch and let you go
Oh, I’d dance alone
To forget that we had ever had it all
This bachata, de hipocresía total
(Mejor me quedo sola
Y me olvido de tus cosas, de tus ojos
Mejor esquivo el polvo
No quiero caer de nuevo en esa foto
De locura, de hipocresía total)

I’ll never love anymore
Leave, turn and tango
One last dance from me with just a song
I’ll never love anymore
Like our bachata
Just a last dance for me in a song
Don’t say you love me anymore
I won’t speak of love
Won’t speak of love anymore
(¿Quién puede hablar del amor y defenderlo?
Levante la mano por favor
¿Quién puede hablar del dolor y pagar la fianza?
Pa’ que salga de mi corazón
Si alguien va a hablar del amor
Te lo aseguro, esa no voy a ser yo)

I’ll never love anymore
Leave, turn and tango
One last dance now from me with just a song
I’ll never love anymore
Like our bachata
Just a last dance for me in a song
Don’t say you love me anymore
I won’t speak of love
Won’t speak of love anymore
Won’t speak of your love no more
(¿Quién puede hablar del amor y defenderlo?
Que levante la mano por favor
¿Quién puede hablar del dolor y pagar la fianza?
Pa’ que salga de mi corazón
Si alguien va a hablar del amor
Te lo aseguro esa no voy a ser yo
Esa no voy a ser yo)

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New Heart

If ever your heart is broken;
Smash it until it becomes
Powdery dust, then pour in
Your tears and mix it all up

Freeze it cold at length;
You’ll get a new heart, and
It will be stronger and better
Never again to fall apart.

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Waves On Shores

These waves that
One day shall bring me
Home on your shores.​

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Armour Of Death

My muse it calls and I shall heed,
A prose it sings, to write and bleed.

You told me to bring
Me back, but can’t you see
You’re connected to me;
I can’t return when you’re
Not back, my heart is dead
Though it might resurrect;
For now it lies, protected
Beneath the armour of death
Perhaps one day it’ll live
May it come sooner yet.

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I’m Losing You

I’m losing you; a
Beautiful plot takes on life
With its own twisted end

I’m losing you; an
Attraction subconsciously drew
Yet repels now at tangents

I’m losing you; a
Futile regret for the unforeseen
That could not be otherwise

O what comic tragedy!
That devastation should strike in
Midst of pure ecstasy.

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